emotional day..

Today my heart is veri heavy burden.. dunno y leh.. Think tired n worried abt other things ba. Money? Hmm.. Bcos i've been working few temp jobs last month n aso found a more stable job already, money not really an issue now. Not that i've earned enough la.. But at least can breathe more relax now. Haha.. Well, sowing n reaping is a God's principle. but mature sons of God are led by the spirit. I'm suspecting that i could be having prob in this issue that's y i feel the burden. So, I've decided to slow down the pace. Not being lazy, but learn to think abt spiritual things more den just money issues now. U mean i did that? Well, if u've such a great task to do n still must carry burden for others... yup. Money issues are taxing on the mind actually. As the saying goes, actions speaks louder den words. So, my first action is, i've decided to stop counting all my pay. Bcos got a few jobs ma. Den pay day all diff ma. So i realised i'm always counting money recently. Time to stop. Anyway, they'll let me know if the pay is bank in already. Wa.. instantly freedom from mind. But after a rough calculations previously, i think i should congrats myself for my hard work. hee.. N so, i grow fatter tis month! N wat am i suppose to get for myself now? A pair of sports shoes. To get rid of the fats! haha.. But i've learnt that dun live yr life wif regrets. So, if wana eat, just eat la... haha.. I dunno how much i spent on rewarding myself for my hard work already but i aso dun wana count la. Haha.. But i think i should stop now. Hee.. Another thing i realised is that in the midst of working for so many diff kind of ppl, i find that there're some who do their work nicely but some who really should give them a slap in thier faces! Working in coporate world behaviour so disgusting. I shoot him back n luckily for him, he used his brians before replying my sms. If not... humph! But he took super long time to reply. haha.. stress him.. serve him rite! I'm not his previous Pa type of gal man.. Open yr eyes look carefully hor.. haix.. nowadays working life aso must show great wisdom. Thank God Jesus is my indwelling wisdom! :> hee.. Mooncake festival this fri! haha.. But i'm not interested in lanterns or playing wif fire lehx.. Dunno wat e cg wana play wif.. Hee.. Dunno.. just go lor.. I'm thinking shall i buy some ice-cream mooncakes for my family. They cost quite a bit. But i'm so sick n tired of the normal yoke n w/o yoke one. Just thinking abt them can make me puke! Cos got one yr, i played Number game wif cg, i ended up the only one eating! Cos i discern the number correctly everytime! So sick! Yeek!.. I never knew i'm so gd wif numbers. How cum i dunno next week TOTO wat number will cum up ah? haha.. joking.. know aso cannot buy. Wrong spirit. Pastor preached before. Cos God dun bless that way de. yup. Another food i dislike is 'tangyuan'. My grandma always force me to eat wen young. That time was those traditional type. They use the pandan leaves to cook the soup. So terrible the smell! Den i said i didn't wana eat, my grandma scolded me till i cried. She said dun eat, won't grow up one more yr older. Even though i was still veri small, aso knew that wasn't true. Wan me to eat, say la.. Cher.. But bcos was forced to eat, dun like it wen i grew up. Although now got lots of favours, but still eek.. to me. Haha.. I think wen i'm force to do certain things rite, i'll have great resentment towards it wen i grow up. Eg, my grandma used to force me to only wear skirts n dresses wen i was young. Yup! only that wor.. U open my woredore, only skirts n dresses, not a single pair of jeans! I begged my parents to buy jeans for me wen i was in sec sch cos i cannot stand my peers mocking anymore. Really.. Since den, i hardly wear skirts or dress. Aso dun like to dress up. Hmm..But now dressing up is like a mannerism thing already. Especially in the workforce. But i need to renew my thinking first. haha.. Dun wana do it for the sake of doing it. Yup.